Well may be the first volunteer to get the boot - but it was just a matter of time I guess

Well the KASOW Chairman replied by comment to my recent posting KASOW’s Request for 7400 KS ($130) from me - another Joke!. I am just too honest, stupid and outspoken for my own good. So I was told not to Volunteer at Kanyawegi (so how does one get told not to volunteer anymore?) but I guess if you've been reading my postings I gave you a forwarning of my opinion. I'm sorry but I definitely could have have been more tact ful. But anyone that knows me well realizes that I always say what's on my mind. I don't take any crap or when someone is trying to take advantage of me over money or whatever I see red and tell them off.
I've tried to figure out why I'm like that and maybe should give Dr. Phil a call for a reason why. The only thing I can think of is my family got shafted and moved to an internment camp when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor and they lost their house and belongings. This is after my dad served in the Canadian army in battle. If I was around back then I would have been so pissed. I just think you can't let someone short change or walk over you and not stick up for your principles and not say something. I know that's a lame excuse but what else could it be as I don't think I have a chip on my shoulder about it or bitter! I just don't take any crap and let it be known, I guess. But then why is no one else in my family so outspoken and undiplomatic! Beats me! Well I'm definitely going to try to correct it as my 2008 New Year's resolution!

Hey I really love the people of Kenya and have no reason to anymore frustrated than other volunteers. It's just I just can't ignore like most. I'm really not the only person who is experiencing the same frustrations. However most of them are very diplomatic and keep their mouths shut.
I got an email from some one who's in Capetown in Heathrow when I was coming to Kenya.
She told me the following:"I'm glad to hear that you're time in Kenya has been so eye-opening, even though from what it sounds like on your blog, frustrating. I've experienced some of that same here in Cape Town too. It's very very frustrating. I understand your dilemma `. "

I'm in Uganda right now and travelled with a Canadian girl who's on an internship. She's the only muzungu (white) working for this NGO. She faces the same frustrations plus she can't trust her mentor! But she has the smarts just to put up with it. I talked to this English girl in a hostel in Jinja last night who's working for a NGO and she told me the same type of thing. She told me most Americans don't put up with a lot of crap and voice their opinion. I don't say they're the only nationality that does that as some of Canadians do too. But then I worked in Seattle for the past 6 years and feel quite American too! Most people can just ignore it I guess.

I do know I feel terrible if some of the friends I made in Kanyawegi are upset at me. I talk to them as friends and joke around with them so hopefully they don't misinterpret what I say. But I deserve what ever trash they pile on me but I've getting that from people all my life.

So to my family and friends who donated to my trip. I'm offering to return your donations as my way of saying sorry if I maybe let you down. I received it to help setup the Computer Resource Center and I got it started. But if you feel like I let you down just let know and I'll send it back

I've been too embarrassed to tell you guys but it's probably been 3 months since you donated it and I still haven't received the funds. So I'm been using my own money in the meantime as I didn't have the heart to say it hasn't arrived. So it got to the point that I decided a few weeks to just return the donations to you guys, so let me know how you want it done. But this lateness of the donation you paid has been sort of at the heart of my predictament. However it still doesn't excuse me for not using any tact in my email.

I keep forgetting that I'm dealing with people of a different culture but I've always just treated the Kenyans as my equal and say to them what I say to anybody - MISTAKE! So I'll apologize to the KASOW Committee for writing them that email. However I still stick to what I said but if I had to do it again I'd wouldn't be so outspoken but with the same thoughts.

So unfortunately I became a casualty of my own doing. So for the people who don't know me well, my heart was in the right place too bad my mouth isn't. I've come to the conclusion that although I love Africa and volunteering. I don't think Africa/Kenya is ready or needs volunteers like me!

Well we only have 2 weeks left in the village and I had already made plans to go to Uganda and Nakuru for 2 weeks. Heck I'm not upset at the Committee as I forget what I say 5 mins after saying it. Plus I had fun in the village while it lasted and I can say I made some great new friends. I hope they don't just remember and talk about me as that crazy muzungu for I don't want to be remembered that way. So if anyone is still interested in reading my blogs they will probably be about my Walkabouts in Uganda, Kenya and Tanzania. If I can get to a computer. But please free to comment and trash me as I can handle it as well as dish it out! Sorry for giving Canadians a bad name - that did I read in the comment that it will take years to recover. Heck even my 2 kids are scared that their Dad will say something to embarrass them. So I guess you could say they can place title of that old song "I did it My Way" on my epitaph when someone who I upset one day puts me away 6 ft under.